Dry January, Choc free January, Cheese free, dairy free, sugar free, everything free…. Why is the question. It could be weight loss, but not for me, I’m lucky there. But I got sucked in half through experiment and half through challenge.

Kendal Film Festival was a good one this year. The highlight for me was listening to Dave MacLeod. Now he is a man who knows how to watch his food! Breakfast = eggs and salad; lunch = chicken and salad, evening = chicken and veg. That’s it! When someone asked if he’d even given up beer Dave just looked confused, like the guy had asked if he’d given up injecting heroin. Apparently for Dave, a ‘normal’ diet gets him up 8c, but 9a requires the extra mile.

I logged this super discipline and instantly ruled it out. I’ve climbed 9a, 9a+, even 9b on a diet of chocolate and cheese so no need to put myself through the wringer. Though 9c would be worth it, clearly that wasn’t actually possible.

Christmas. Stuffed almost to death and hanging out with my brother. He was giving stuff up for New Year. Food stuff. In an attempt to see if food stuff caused any health issues. Others were also giving up stuff; wheat for inflammatory issues and bad guts, dairy for clogged sinuses, sugar for out-of-control energy levels and headaches. But my brother dished their plans saying the only way to go was to ditch everything, otherwise after a month you’ll only have investigated one diet component; “drop everything and if after a month nothing happens then you’ll know you can go back to the same crap as before”.

Strangely, for someone who lives for cake and biscuits and lasagne, this plan seemed somehow interesting, like some kind of science experiment. All in (or out as it were) would be a proper challenge too. I like a challenge, though this one was gonna be 9a+ level.

I gave up wheat last year for a month and felt better, though apparently not better enough, as I immediately reverted back to pasta-bake and chocolate croissants. And having started on the wheat again I didn’t feel any worse. Conclusion, either wheat had no effect, or I ignored any negative effects because I like cake. But whatever, it wasn’t like I was suddenly awesome on gluten free boredom and then knackered once I devoured a toasted cheese sandwich.

But maybe binning everything could do something cool. I’m not young, I’ve got knackered bits that could do with some help. In the space of a month I’ll know (maybe longer is really needed, but one month will do for now).

Half way through and it’s easy and hard. First of all I’m never hungry, in fact often too full, as there are now lots of nice things to eat and sample as opposed to just a standard regular cheese butty requiring no thought or effort. In fact there is no problem with nice food, there are tons of options. I made awesome flapjack last night and could hardly sleep I was so stuffed. But at the same time I have this nagging feeling that I’m denying myself. It’s also tough to cook pasta bake, pancakes, pies, cookies, Yorkshires and a ton of other things for the family and then have something else myself.

This is whats lying around our house. Its not all mine, but a lot is, and is a Christmas excess for sure which would even last a while on normal eating standards, but its in my face and a good test of will power. I'll have one of those oranges...

For my efforts I’m expecting a lot. More energy, less aches and pains, no headaches, better skin, better mood, less grey hair, getting taller and possibly younger. So far nothing to report, other than I’m aware of the huge amount of chocolate and cake hanging around that I can’t eat. And also the fact that I’m without doubt addicted to chocolate, and the results are gonna have to be pretty damn good for me not to wade into my box of Lindt chocolate balls in a few weeks. But what if they are damn good? I guess if I feel awesome I’ll happily pass on my chocolate stash, like giving away a pack of 20 Benson and Hedges, a thing now of no interest or value to me whatsoever. It could go in the bin and I wouldn’t even flinch. I’ll just not crave that stuff. We will see….